Unapologetic confession: I really love Twilight. I’ve read the books through twice and have seen all of the movies.
Apologetic confession: I continue to follow the Robert Pattinson / Kristen Stewart breakup. (Unrelated sidenote: I found this link of Kristen Stewart’s Grumpiest Faces Ever looking for the previous link.)
Things I have done as a result of or directly preceding a break up:
2. Listen to sad, sad, mopey songs. After a high school breakup, my friend Clay made me a fantastically mopey mixed tape. The song that I most remember rewinding and replaying is High and Dry, by Radiohead. Mope-tastic.
3. Lose my appetite. Lose 15 pounds. Not my best move.
4. Cry into pillow.
5. Call my mom. At 6:30am. Then at 6:45am. And probably, let’s be honest, in 20-30 minute increments for the rest of the day. For 2 weeks in a row.
6. Call my grandma. I’ve written about this before. I asked her if I was going to end up alone. She asked me if I was drunk. (For the record, I was not.)
7. Cry onto teddy bear.
8. Write a letter to lost love and tell him that I had gone to the mall shopping with another guy. And bought a bikini there. (It was a friend and I needed a new bathing suit. Unmentioned in the letter.) His parents intercepted it and read it instead. Fail. Again, let’s be honest in admitting that it was a fail from the start. Double fail.
9. Pack away all nostalgic remnants of previous love into a closet. Cry maniacally in the car, in public, when I find a keychain with my name on it he made me in the car door cupholder of which I forgot to dispose.
10. Cry onto Catboy.
11. Make Lola continually recap with me what happened. And why I was better off. And how the new girl he was dating was no-contest ugly. Because everyone knows that when girls feel bad about themselves they have a compulsive need to tear down any girls threatening their mope-fest with their attractiveness, intelligence, wittiness, or general je ne sais quoi.
12. Cry on floor. Wipe snot with sock on floor. (A repeat performance.)
As I said in my previous post, I am eternally grateful for Ryan. As are my mother, grandma, Lola, and Catboy. I will, however, admit to still having regressed into using the sock-kleenex thing in recent years. (But just for regular sad stuff- not breakups. I think I am saying that to justify it. Don’t worry. I do know it is unjustifiable… but convenient, non?)